Written in the Walls: 7/??
Jan. 21st, 2011 05:56 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lalalive23Title: Written in the Walls
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
lalalive23
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Bell/Dom and a few original characters.
Summary: AU. Matt and Dom are teachers at a local high school in 1954. They don't want their relationship to be discovered, especially by those they work with, even though they've been living together for nearly 4 years. This is the story of what happens when the school librarian discovers them.
Warning: Fluff and sexual content
Feedback: It's my Kubrick, it's my Jesus.
Disclaimer: I don't own Muse. I don't make money off this. This never happened. I do, however, own the characters Ellen and Martin, and their respective family members/coworkers. They are mine, so please do not take them. I am willing to share if you want to collaborate on something, but otherwise no touchy plz!
Note: Jesus. It's been since October 29 that I've posted a chapter of this. Wanna know the sad thing? I've had this chapter and about 9 others after it drafted it since before I started TLS. Working this today...it was like coming home. It's the first fic I've ever written, and even though I've gone off and formulated one offs and about 3 other series that I'm planning on starting, this will always be nestled in my heart. I love these boys and are they are fucking REJOICING at getting some play again. I hope you enjoy this. I'm linking to the old chapters because I know it's 99% probable you've all forgotten where we left off/that this existed. I do hope you enjoy this. <333 Endless love and cookies todolce_piccante , millionstar , and sunshine_173 for being cheerleaders, bit readers, inspiration givers, writing party buddies and generally the best girls anyone could ask for. Again, my fic would be shite without them.
Prologue Chapter 1 Chapter 2A Chapter 2B Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6
Matthew
Once again, I found myself eyeing Ellen with child-like curiosity, my days in the library becoming consumed with Ellen and Dominic as distractions. My fingers idly dragged along the corner pages of my book, the French text hardly as captivating as both male and female visions before my eyes. There seemed to be a change in her demeanor, a lightness to her being that had not been there before. A gleam in her eye had replaced the melancholic shade I had come to know so well, making her appear several years younger than I had ever seen her look.
Her wedding ring was kept in front of her, off her finger and diagonally away from her body as she worked through the catalogue cards. No longer containing the rigidness in her spine, her worked quickly, with a smile, as though she had new found dedication to her job and her life, but clearly not her marriage.
This change had been occurring over the course of several days, starting with one Monday several weeks ago. She had appeared relaxed and well rested, a weight still upon her shoulders, but she no longer seemed bothered by the pressure. Her smiles came easily, her laughter came often, and I had found myself overwhelmingly pleased to think that I was learning the true Ellen, if only at a distance. Dominic had noticed it as well, discussing her quiet changes as we sat on the couch, limbs tangled and fingers entwined. It had crossed his mind several times to invite her over for dinner, to invite her out to lunch, sensing in his kind way that she could probably use a friend.
His wishes, we both knew, were merely pipe dreams for an era we knew we would never live to see. She would not accept us, and if she did, society would no longer accept her.
The soft scratch of a chair not far from me pulled my eyes from the librarian, and I watched with unmasked interest as my lover stood from his seated position and smirked wickedly at me. My eyes widened as I followed his motions, wondering if his steps would lead him to our secret place or if he was merely returning a book to one of the shelves behind us. Warmth filled me as I watched his chest flutter with a silent chuckle, knowing well what my hungry stare was after. Instead he turned, gifting me with a prime view of his arse in tight gray dress trousers as he casually walked behind me to return his book.
Weeks had passed since our clandestine discovery of the little room, and Dominic and I had practiced a valiant display of restraint in our attempts to limit ourselves in its usage. At home, in the privacy of our bedroom, we had discussed with fervor how often we were willing to test the boundaries of our morals and of Ellen's watchful eye, and we had settled on the idea that once a week should be enough to satisfy our perpetual craving for one another at the most indecent of places. After Dominic's seductive act of reading me poetry that, while not erotic in content, was erotic when laced with the simply carnal inflections in his voice, we had kept our miniature excursions uncharacteristically chaste. He had questioned me softly about my hesitancy, and with a slight blush of my cheeks, I admitted that it was my fear of a student discovering our endeavors that prevented me from enjoying him with unbridled lust.
With a sigh I bought my gaze begrudgingly back to Proust. Maintaining the guise of focus, I listened only to the sound of my lover's footsteps as they headed away from me and back again. Words before my eyes swam in incomprehensible patterns, the accents and periods morphing into a dream of nothingness. I had read the book hundreds of times before, Les Plaisirs et les Jours being my favourite piece of his. In every way a bad French teacher, I had never brought myself to work through the dictionary length piece that was A la Recherche du Temps Perdu. While at uni, I had given my peers the excuse that I simply had not had the time, silently omitting the fact that I also did not have the sheer force of will, and, over time, my primary excuse became closer to the truth than I had ever imagined it would. I did not have the time, and I highly doubted that I ever would.
Light footsteps floated back to my ears, knowing well that it was Dominic in the distinct way he shifted his weight on his feet. I watched him pass me through the corner of my eye, my glasses drooping low on my nose as I peered over the frames once more at his arse as it swayed. Like a love-sick, possessive teenager, I could not help the lewd grin that painted my lips at the sight.
My back straightened as I noted the path his feet were taking him, guiding him over to Ellen where he bent to speak quietly to her. She smiled happily at him, nodding and waving him toward the hallway we had learned so well. Seeing how easily she responded to him made me yearn for her intimate friendship, to include her. I shook the idea from my head, knowing well it could not and would not happen. Instead, excitement pooled in my belly in anticipation for our imminent tryst. Already I could feel my body calling out to him, my leg starting to twitch before it was my turn to walk down the hallway to join him.
It was customary that he or I would wait five minutes at least to join the other, hoping to throw others in the small library off our trail. Ellen had never noticed, nor had anyone else questioned us. We had, we believed, mastered the secreted and transformed it into a work of art. My body had become attuned to the timing, knowing exactly when five minutes had passed without ever needing to look at a clock or watch. I could feel it, much the way I could feel him waiting for me 30 meters away.
Fiddling with my tie, I dropped my pen and closed my book, one hand keeping my things in order as the other loosened the knot around my neck. It was no secret that Dominic adored the way I looked without a tie, and loosening the one around my neck made it easy for him to tug it off slowly, as he so loved to do. It was a treated I had not bestowed upon him for some time now, and I smiled to myself knowing just how well he would appreciate the gesture.
Lifting myself from my seat, a coy smirk spread across my face as I walked in a blissful dream towards the hallway. As I passed Ellen, I nodded my head in the direction of the hall, silently asking for permission into the restricted section.
She nodded eagerly, her eyes seeming to glow as she did so. "Absolutely, go ahead! I don't know why ask for permission anymore, really."
I chuckled. 'Thank you, Ellen." I didn't need to say anything more than that. Dominic was waiting.
Around me I could hear the echo of my feet in the empty hall, wishing that the same could be said for the echo of our pleasured moans. It was a filthy thing to think, but hiding from the world in plain sight was an exhausting undertaking. Having done it for the past 14 years of my life, I was becoming entirely bored with the process.
Through the frosted window I could see that Dominic had already turned the overhead light on, and I opened the door all to eager to see him standing before me.
His back was too me, blonde head bent as he lightly leaned against a shelf reading a book. His relaxed posture was exquisite, legs casually crossed, one hands on his hip as the other held whatever piece was before him. The long line of his back was revealed to me through his slim fitting jumper. Unconsciously, I liked my lips at the sight, feeling myself get hard just by being in his presence for mere seconds. The reaction my body had around him was uncontrollable, undeniable, and, from the day I had met him, showed no signs of ever disappearing.
Only his head turned as he heard the door snap shut behind me, lips parted and eyes wide in surprise. Quickly, his full lips formed a smile, eyes softening at the sight of me eyeing him so wantonly. I heard the book in his hand snap shut as he turned to face me fully, eyes beckoning me into the dimly lit privacy from the room and away from the window.
"You shouldn't be so surprised. Don't try and pretend you don't have our timing down to a science," I teased as I slowly walked toward him, noting that my steps had turned into a seductive prowl.
"I can't help it if I'm discovering I have a strange fixation with Sacher-Masoch," he said coyly as he turned from me to put the book away.
I shook my head as I reached him, my tongue clucking at him gently. "You should look into de Musset. Two Nights of Excess. Sounds much like our first days together, does it not? I can't believe you ignored it."
His gray eyes met mine, and for a moment, I found myself suddenly unable to breathe.
"Why would I want to read about something I've already lived through?" His statement was calm, gentle, and so wonderfully heavy with seriousness that my body found itself simply unable to deny him any longer.
My arms wrapped around his waist, holding close to my body as his arms lopped to the small of my back. We shared the silence together, breathing the same air as our eye lids half closed in ecstasy. No other movement needed to happen, for I was content in those minutes just to have him against me, as though the mere pressure against my body placated any form of anxiety or knowledge of the outside world.
His hold on me suddenly became possessive, as his eyes searched mine, seeming to have found something in them that he liked, loved, adored, and needed. I will never know what it was, the mood of the atmosphere shifting around me in weighted swirls of delight, as he pressed a powerful kiss to my lips that left me staggered and speechless. My synapses tingled, the force of the kiss seeming only to take its true affect in the aftermath, and I was overcome with emotion. He brought a hand to my neck, tracing along the loose edges of my tie. I smiled brightly.
"Today, in class, one of the students was talking about his cousin," Dominic began. The anecdote was random, and I was confused of its purpose, but I let him continue figuring that he had a reason for the outburst. "He was calling him filthy words, words I didn't know a kid his age even knew."
I was taken aback and struggled to come up with a reply. I held him tighter as I spoke. "Why was he calling him names? It's his family? I don't understand."
Dominic seemed disturbed, not wanting to continue. "His cousin is...like us. He admitted his sexuality to his family this weekend. They disowned him."
I was stunned. "He announced this to the class?"
He shook his head. "No, I held him after class, planning to discipline him for saying those things. He told me everything. Said his cousin was supposed to be his best friend, and he felt filthy for letting him in the house so many times. He doesn't miss him, Matthew. He called him 'the spawn of Satan.'" He bristled before he continued. "'God hates gays, so the devil made them just to tease him. They go against the bible, go against everything that's holy.'" He recited the words, eyes closed, with tears prickling the sides of his eyes. My insides twisted and my hands reached to cup his cheeks, my thumbs brushing them away.
"How can this be wrong, Matthew?" he whispered. "How is anything we do wrong? I love you, and I want you. It's the same for anyone else in love. How can love be wrong?"
I shook my head furiously, my lips pressing to his urgently before I spoke. "This isn't wrong. We aren't wrong. Things will change. They have to." My words were whispered promises for a future I prayed would come.
"I love you Matthew," he whispered, before kissing me with the same urgency I had used on him. "I love you. I love you." He repeated the words, punctuating them with kisses until our mouths sealed together as though they had been welded.
Hands groped all parts of our bodies, his need for me making itself present against my thigh. He was frustrated, angry, and his body was combining all his conflicting emotions into a cocktail of pent up longing, making itself known in the way his fingers clutched desperately at my shoulder blades.
Our tongues did what our bodies could not, twining together in their own lust-filled and primal dance. Breathing heavily through my nose, I licked along the deep crevices of his mouth, sucking where I could before releasing his mouth to nip delicate patterns of love along his jaw and neck. I loved the sound of him panting beneath me, gasping profanities as his leg ran up and down my shin. Feeling as though the light caress of my teeth had teased him enough, I sucked wetly on his pulse, not bothering to hesitate at the thought of future discretion when it came to the red mark I knew I was leaving on his tender flesh.
The feel of his blood running rapidly beneath my tongue made my cock stiffen, the smell of his skin and the old books behind us tickled my nose in the most carnal of ways, setting my flesh to burning as my hips responded the only way they knew how: thrusting slowly against Dominic's as my mouth ravished his neck the way the rest of me could not.
"Matthew," he gasped above me, "Please. Don't tease."
The sound of his gasps only urged my hips to push harder, eliciting a sharp, high pitched whine from his chest. "Oh god," he cried when he found his voice once more. "Matthew, please. Either fuck me or stop. Matthew, I need you."
He was begging like a child, his fingers pulling at my clothes as he became overcome with absolute pleasure. It was cruel of me, I knew, but I adored the power I had over him, and I would use it as best I could.
My hand, which had been resting on the skin of his lower back beneath his shirt and jumper, slowly dragged itself along the waistband of his trousers, teasing his hip bone before moving to the belt. I pulled my mouth from his neck, eager to see his changing expression as my left hand scratched needy patterns against his back and the right deftly undid his belt, eager to get beneath the button and zip. His gray eyes were black, a colour I loved to see, cheeks flushed and lips red from where he had been biting to muffle his cries. He looked every bit the whore one would kill to buy, and he was mine for free.
The thought sent a shiver through my body, knowing he was mine in mind, body and soul exciting parts of my being I didn't know existed. My most primal and animalistic nature awakening as I saw him nodding eagerly, begging me with his eyes to grasp him between my hand. I could never deny him anything, and I would not start any time soon.
Thrusting my hand beneath his pants and trousers, I gripped him with the sure hand of an expert. It was a veritable truth that, when it came to his body, that was exactly what I was. I knew his curves and muscles, the veins of his cock, and the texture of his skin better than he knew himself. His body had been mine for the claiming, and, all those years ago, when he had surrendered it to me freely, I had decided that I would take the time to learn what was becoming mind inside and out. I would learn so I could properly adore it, I would learn it so I could kill it with the fire of my passion and watch it become reborn in the most biblical of pleasures.
My fist pumped him slowly, loving the way his hips trembled beneath me as they begged my hand to move faster. Pleasuring him with my fist was an activity I would never tire from. Giving him pleasure was a gift in and of itself, my satisfaction coming entirely from the fluttering of his innumerable eyelashes as his eyes closed, the wetness along his lips as he panted to completion, and the way his voice would crack as his essence dripped fire into my palm, burning itself into my skin to merge with my DNA.
"Matthew," he whined. His head twisted from side to side, bowing to his chest as my fist tightened and I dragged my nails along the underside of his cock. "Please...fuck me."
I chuckled darkly. Lifting my mouth to his ear, I licked along the shell and reveled in the whimper he granted me before I whispered. "I will not be 'fucking' you here. You will have to be patient. To be honest, I will not be fucking you ever."
He made a confused sound, as if he were to speak, but my finger dragging along his slit erased any words planning to form on his tongue.
"I will," I continued, "have you tonight. Hot, and begging beneath me as I make love to you. That is how I'm going to have you. Nothing we do will ever be as dirty as 'fucking.'"
"Fine," he cried. "Make love to me. Just please. I need you inside me." Hips bucking wildly into my hand, he tilted his head to nip at my neck and I trembled from the contact.
I would not do something as rash as take him on school grounds, but I could give him something that would be second best. Dragging my left hand down his back, my fingers toyed slowly at the waist band that lead directly to the flesh of his arse. I felt his head nod quickly and roughly against my shoulder.
"Please, oh yes please," he cried.
I laughed, bring my fingers away from his trousers and over to his face to trace lovingly along his lips. "You'll have to suck them yourself, Dominic," I said roughly. I knew he loved when I took demanding tones with him, another gift I felt I should give him. My world exploded in heat as his mouth closed around my index and middle finger, hungrily lapping at them with his tongue as he coated them with as much saliva as he could. He was so terribly good with his mouth, positively godlike when it came to the action of sucking. He knew exactly how to devour my skin and my being from whatever part of me his lips attached to.
Satisfied with the wetness along my digits, I extracted them from his mouth with a pop, and he forget his position momentarily as he looked at me, obviously proud of his work before I brought my hand back to the flesh of his back. The promise of my intentions forced his expression back to one of wild abandon and need, becoming very much a puddy in my hands to be molded as I saw fit.
My fingers circles his entrance slowly, loving the way he shook as though the earth beneath him was quaking as I did so. He pressed our chests together, mouth latching to my neck in expectation of the cry he knew he would give. Pushing my fingers in slowly, I smiled at the heat of him, and laughed at the muffled groan that vibrated from his mouth through my skin and into my pulse, becoming part of me in the process.
My fist and fingers loved him the way I wished I could, teased him in the ways the rest of me would simply have to be patient for. After a few pumps and twists of my fingers, I felt his body go rigid, and smiled as I awaited the flow of his come into my hand.
It never came.
Worried I pulled away from him, staring with sheer concern into his eyes.
They were not on me.
His eyes were on the door.
I did not want to look, but I knew that I had to. Dominic's chest was heaving beneath me. Not in lust, but in fear.
Slowly, I brought my eyes to the door, terrified of what I would find.
Silhouetted by garish hall light behind her, Ellen stood, arms her her sides, catalogue cards at her feet as she starred wide eyed at the scene before her. Lips parted, it looked as though she were about to speak, gasp, or yell. But she had made no sound. In one motion she turned from us and shut the door, bolting down the hall.
I was frozen, feeling Dominic react beneath me as he put his clothes back into place
"Matthew!" he cried urgently. "Matthew, fucking go after her!"
I brought my eyes back to him, watching as his gray orbs glistened with frightful tears. I could not respond as freely as he could. I did not know why, no tears or sounds coming from me in that moment. I envied him.
"Matthew! For fuck's sake! Go!"
His command was the catalyst I needed, grabbing his face and kissing his lips fiercely before I left. I sucked what courage I could from his mouth, hoping that our love would give me the strength to make it through the next 10 minutes, 10 days and, possibly, 10 years.
I ran after Ellen, ripping open the door and quickly turning the corner as I left Dominic to fix himself before he returned to the public eye. Every fiber of my essence prayed she had not gone to the headmaster, had not told a teacher, had not left completely.
I found her, back to me, behind her desk as she shook and anxiously wrung her hands together. She shook them, hoping the nerves would leave her, but they did not, and she took to wringing them once more.
Standing in front of her desk, I look a long, deep breath before I found the strength to speak. "Ellen," I whispered loudly, urgently. She turned quickly, seeing me before her, and then brought her eyes to the wall next to her. She was panting, hands still in front of her as she listened to me speak. "Ellen, please you have to let us explain."
"I never - I didn't - I just needed to - I wanted - my job -" she could hardly form sentences as her eyes avoided me completely. It stung more than I thought it would, but, then again, my trust needed to be entirely in her and I knew it was faulty, her inability to look at me saying everything I didn't need to know.
"Please," I whispered in a cry. "Please, let us. I am begging you."
She turned to me then, eyes wide with fear. In that moment, I had never seen her look more beautiful.
Slowly, she began to nod, silently affirming that she would allow us to attempt to explain and reason with her. It was in that nod that I realized that the future of my career and my relationship was entirely in her hands from that moment on.
Author:
lalalive23 Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Bell/Dom and a few original characters.
Summary: AU. Matt and Dom are teachers at a local high school in 1954. They don't want their relationship to be discovered, especially by those they work with, even though they've been living together for nearly 4 years. This is the story of what happens when the school librarian discovers them.
Warning: Fluff and sexual content
Feedback: It's my Kubrick, it's my Jesus.
Disclaimer: I don't own Muse. I don't make money off this. This never happened. I do, however, own the characters Ellen and Martin, and their respective family members/coworkers. They are mine, so please do not take them. I am willing to share if you want to collaborate on something, but otherwise no touchy plz!
Note: Jesus. It's been since October 29 that I've posted a chapter of this. Wanna know the sad thing? I've had this chapter and about 9 others after it drafted it since before I started TLS. Working this today...it was like coming home. It's the first fic I've ever written, and even though I've gone off and formulated one offs and about 3 other series that I'm planning on starting, this will always be nestled in my heart. I love these boys and are they are fucking REJOICING at getting some play again. I hope you enjoy this. I'm linking to the old chapters because I know it's 99% probable you've all forgotten where we left off/that this existed. I do hope you enjoy this. <333 Endless love and cookies to
dolce_piccante , millionstar , and sunshine_173 for being cheerleaders, bit readers, inspiration givers, writing party buddies and generally the best girls anyone could ask for. Again, my fic would be shite without them. Prologue Chapter 1 Chapter 2A Chapter 2B Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6
Matthew
Once again, I found myself eyeing Ellen with child-like curiosity, my days in the library becoming consumed with Ellen and Dominic as distractions. My fingers idly dragged along the corner pages of my book, the French text hardly as captivating as both male and female visions before my eyes. There seemed to be a change in her demeanor, a lightness to her being that had not been there before. A gleam in her eye had replaced the melancholic shade I had come to know so well, making her appear several years younger than I had ever seen her look.
Her wedding ring was kept in front of her, off her finger and diagonally away from her body as she worked through the catalogue cards. No longer containing the rigidness in her spine, her worked quickly, with a smile, as though she had new found dedication to her job and her life, but clearly not her marriage.
This change had been occurring over the course of several days, starting with one Monday several weeks ago. She had appeared relaxed and well rested, a weight still upon her shoulders, but she no longer seemed bothered by the pressure. Her smiles came easily, her laughter came often, and I had found myself overwhelmingly pleased to think that I was learning the true Ellen, if only at a distance. Dominic had noticed it as well, discussing her quiet changes as we sat on the couch, limbs tangled and fingers entwined. It had crossed his mind several times to invite her over for dinner, to invite her out to lunch, sensing in his kind way that she could probably use a friend.
His wishes, we both knew, were merely pipe dreams for an era we knew we would never live to see. She would not accept us, and if she did, society would no longer accept her.
The soft scratch of a chair not far from me pulled my eyes from the librarian, and I watched with unmasked interest as my lover stood from his seated position and smirked wickedly at me. My eyes widened as I followed his motions, wondering if his steps would lead him to our secret place or if he was merely returning a book to one of the shelves behind us. Warmth filled me as I watched his chest flutter with a silent chuckle, knowing well what my hungry stare was after. Instead he turned, gifting me with a prime view of his arse in tight gray dress trousers as he casually walked behind me to return his book.
Weeks had passed since our clandestine discovery of the little room, and Dominic and I had practiced a valiant display of restraint in our attempts to limit ourselves in its usage. At home, in the privacy of our bedroom, we had discussed with fervor how often we were willing to test the boundaries of our morals and of Ellen's watchful eye, and we had settled on the idea that once a week should be enough to satisfy our perpetual craving for one another at the most indecent of places. After Dominic's seductive act of reading me poetry that, while not erotic in content, was erotic when laced with the simply carnal inflections in his voice, we had kept our miniature excursions uncharacteristically chaste. He had questioned me softly about my hesitancy, and with a slight blush of my cheeks, I admitted that it was my fear of a student discovering our endeavors that prevented me from enjoying him with unbridled lust.
With a sigh I bought my gaze begrudgingly back to Proust. Maintaining the guise of focus, I listened only to the sound of my lover's footsteps as they headed away from me and back again. Words before my eyes swam in incomprehensible patterns, the accents and periods morphing into a dream of nothingness. I had read the book hundreds of times before, Les Plaisirs et les Jours being my favourite piece of his. In every way a bad French teacher, I had never brought myself to work through the dictionary length piece that was A la Recherche du Temps Perdu. While at uni, I had given my peers the excuse that I simply had not had the time, silently omitting the fact that I also did not have the sheer force of will, and, over time, my primary excuse became closer to the truth than I had ever imagined it would. I did not have the time, and I highly doubted that I ever would.
Light footsteps floated back to my ears, knowing well that it was Dominic in the distinct way he shifted his weight on his feet. I watched him pass me through the corner of my eye, my glasses drooping low on my nose as I peered over the frames once more at his arse as it swayed. Like a love-sick, possessive teenager, I could not help the lewd grin that painted my lips at the sight.
My back straightened as I noted the path his feet were taking him, guiding him over to Ellen where he bent to speak quietly to her. She smiled happily at him, nodding and waving him toward the hallway we had learned so well. Seeing how easily she responded to him made me yearn for her intimate friendship, to include her. I shook the idea from my head, knowing well it could not and would not happen. Instead, excitement pooled in my belly in anticipation for our imminent tryst. Already I could feel my body calling out to him, my leg starting to twitch before it was my turn to walk down the hallway to join him.
It was customary that he or I would wait five minutes at least to join the other, hoping to throw others in the small library off our trail. Ellen had never noticed, nor had anyone else questioned us. We had, we believed, mastered the secreted and transformed it into a work of art. My body had become attuned to the timing, knowing exactly when five minutes had passed without ever needing to look at a clock or watch. I could feel it, much the way I could feel him waiting for me 30 meters away.
Fiddling with my tie, I dropped my pen and closed my book, one hand keeping my things in order as the other loosened the knot around my neck. It was no secret that Dominic adored the way I looked without a tie, and loosening the one around my neck made it easy for him to tug it off slowly, as he so loved to do. It was a treated I had not bestowed upon him for some time now, and I smiled to myself knowing just how well he would appreciate the gesture.
Lifting myself from my seat, a coy smirk spread across my face as I walked in a blissful dream towards the hallway. As I passed Ellen, I nodded my head in the direction of the hall, silently asking for permission into the restricted section.
She nodded eagerly, her eyes seeming to glow as she did so. "Absolutely, go ahead! I don't know why ask for permission anymore, really."
I chuckled. 'Thank you, Ellen." I didn't need to say anything more than that. Dominic was waiting.
Around me I could hear the echo of my feet in the empty hall, wishing that the same could be said for the echo of our pleasured moans. It was a filthy thing to think, but hiding from the world in plain sight was an exhausting undertaking. Having done it for the past 14 years of my life, I was becoming entirely bored with the process.
Through the frosted window I could see that Dominic had already turned the overhead light on, and I opened the door all to eager to see him standing before me.
His back was too me, blonde head bent as he lightly leaned against a shelf reading a book. His relaxed posture was exquisite, legs casually crossed, one hands on his hip as the other held whatever piece was before him. The long line of his back was revealed to me through his slim fitting jumper. Unconsciously, I liked my lips at the sight, feeling myself get hard just by being in his presence for mere seconds. The reaction my body had around him was uncontrollable, undeniable, and, from the day I had met him, showed no signs of ever disappearing.
Only his head turned as he heard the door snap shut behind me, lips parted and eyes wide in surprise. Quickly, his full lips formed a smile, eyes softening at the sight of me eyeing him so wantonly. I heard the book in his hand snap shut as he turned to face me fully, eyes beckoning me into the dimly lit privacy from the room and away from the window.
"You shouldn't be so surprised. Don't try and pretend you don't have our timing down to a science," I teased as I slowly walked toward him, noting that my steps had turned into a seductive prowl.
"I can't help it if I'm discovering I have a strange fixation with Sacher-Masoch," he said coyly as he turned from me to put the book away.
I shook my head as I reached him, my tongue clucking at him gently. "You should look into de Musset. Two Nights of Excess. Sounds much like our first days together, does it not? I can't believe you ignored it."
His gray eyes met mine, and for a moment, I found myself suddenly unable to breathe.
"Why would I want to read about something I've already lived through?" His statement was calm, gentle, and so wonderfully heavy with seriousness that my body found itself simply unable to deny him any longer.
My arms wrapped around his waist, holding close to my body as his arms lopped to the small of my back. We shared the silence together, breathing the same air as our eye lids half closed in ecstasy. No other movement needed to happen, for I was content in those minutes just to have him against me, as though the mere pressure against my body placated any form of anxiety or knowledge of the outside world.
His hold on me suddenly became possessive, as his eyes searched mine, seeming to have found something in them that he liked, loved, adored, and needed. I will never know what it was, the mood of the atmosphere shifting around me in weighted swirls of delight, as he pressed a powerful kiss to my lips that left me staggered and speechless. My synapses tingled, the force of the kiss seeming only to take its true affect in the aftermath, and I was overcome with emotion. He brought a hand to my neck, tracing along the loose edges of my tie. I smiled brightly.
"Today, in class, one of the students was talking about his cousin," Dominic began. The anecdote was random, and I was confused of its purpose, but I let him continue figuring that he had a reason for the outburst. "He was calling him filthy words, words I didn't know a kid his age even knew."
I was taken aback and struggled to come up with a reply. I held him tighter as I spoke. "Why was he calling him names? It's his family? I don't understand."
Dominic seemed disturbed, not wanting to continue. "His cousin is...like us. He admitted his sexuality to his family this weekend. They disowned him."
I was stunned. "He announced this to the class?"
He shook his head. "No, I held him after class, planning to discipline him for saying those things. He told me everything. Said his cousin was supposed to be his best friend, and he felt filthy for letting him in the house so many times. He doesn't miss him, Matthew. He called him 'the spawn of Satan.'" He bristled before he continued. "'God hates gays, so the devil made them just to tease him. They go against the bible, go against everything that's holy.'" He recited the words, eyes closed, with tears prickling the sides of his eyes. My insides twisted and my hands reached to cup his cheeks, my thumbs brushing them away.
"How can this be wrong, Matthew?" he whispered. "How is anything we do wrong? I love you, and I want you. It's the same for anyone else in love. How can love be wrong?"
I shook my head furiously, my lips pressing to his urgently before I spoke. "This isn't wrong. We aren't wrong. Things will change. They have to." My words were whispered promises for a future I prayed would come.
"I love you Matthew," he whispered, before kissing me with the same urgency I had used on him. "I love you. I love you." He repeated the words, punctuating them with kisses until our mouths sealed together as though they had been welded.
Hands groped all parts of our bodies, his need for me making itself present against my thigh. He was frustrated, angry, and his body was combining all his conflicting emotions into a cocktail of pent up longing, making itself known in the way his fingers clutched desperately at my shoulder blades.
Our tongues did what our bodies could not, twining together in their own lust-filled and primal dance. Breathing heavily through my nose, I licked along the deep crevices of his mouth, sucking where I could before releasing his mouth to nip delicate patterns of love along his jaw and neck. I loved the sound of him panting beneath me, gasping profanities as his leg ran up and down my shin. Feeling as though the light caress of my teeth had teased him enough, I sucked wetly on his pulse, not bothering to hesitate at the thought of future discretion when it came to the red mark I knew I was leaving on his tender flesh.
The feel of his blood running rapidly beneath my tongue made my cock stiffen, the smell of his skin and the old books behind us tickled my nose in the most carnal of ways, setting my flesh to burning as my hips responded the only way they knew how: thrusting slowly against Dominic's as my mouth ravished his neck the way the rest of me could not.
"Matthew," he gasped above me, "Please. Don't tease."
The sound of his gasps only urged my hips to push harder, eliciting a sharp, high pitched whine from his chest. "Oh god," he cried when he found his voice once more. "Matthew, please. Either fuck me or stop. Matthew, I need you."
He was begging like a child, his fingers pulling at my clothes as he became overcome with absolute pleasure. It was cruel of me, I knew, but I adored the power I had over him, and I would use it as best I could.
My hand, which had been resting on the skin of his lower back beneath his shirt and jumper, slowly dragged itself along the waistband of his trousers, teasing his hip bone before moving to the belt. I pulled my mouth from his neck, eager to see his changing expression as my left hand scratched needy patterns against his back and the right deftly undid his belt, eager to get beneath the button and zip. His gray eyes were black, a colour I loved to see, cheeks flushed and lips red from where he had been biting to muffle his cries. He looked every bit the whore one would kill to buy, and he was mine for free.
The thought sent a shiver through my body, knowing he was mine in mind, body and soul exciting parts of my being I didn't know existed. My most primal and animalistic nature awakening as I saw him nodding eagerly, begging me with his eyes to grasp him between my hand. I could never deny him anything, and I would not start any time soon.
Thrusting my hand beneath his pants and trousers, I gripped him with the sure hand of an expert. It was a veritable truth that, when it came to his body, that was exactly what I was. I knew his curves and muscles, the veins of his cock, and the texture of his skin better than he knew himself. His body had been mine for the claiming, and, all those years ago, when he had surrendered it to me freely, I had decided that I would take the time to learn what was becoming mind inside and out. I would learn so I could properly adore it, I would learn it so I could kill it with the fire of my passion and watch it become reborn in the most biblical of pleasures.
My fist pumped him slowly, loving the way his hips trembled beneath me as they begged my hand to move faster. Pleasuring him with my fist was an activity I would never tire from. Giving him pleasure was a gift in and of itself, my satisfaction coming entirely from the fluttering of his innumerable eyelashes as his eyes closed, the wetness along his lips as he panted to completion, and the way his voice would crack as his essence dripped fire into my palm, burning itself into my skin to merge with my DNA.
"Matthew," he whined. His head twisted from side to side, bowing to his chest as my fist tightened and I dragged my nails along the underside of his cock. "Please...fuck me."
I chuckled darkly. Lifting my mouth to his ear, I licked along the shell and reveled in the whimper he granted me before I whispered. "I will not be 'fucking' you here. You will have to be patient. To be honest, I will not be fucking you ever."
He made a confused sound, as if he were to speak, but my finger dragging along his slit erased any words planning to form on his tongue.
"I will," I continued, "have you tonight. Hot, and begging beneath me as I make love to you. That is how I'm going to have you. Nothing we do will ever be as dirty as 'fucking.'"
"Fine," he cried. "Make love to me. Just please. I need you inside me." Hips bucking wildly into my hand, he tilted his head to nip at my neck and I trembled from the contact.
I would not do something as rash as take him on school grounds, but I could give him something that would be second best. Dragging my left hand down his back, my fingers toyed slowly at the waist band that lead directly to the flesh of his arse. I felt his head nod quickly and roughly against my shoulder.
"Please, oh yes please," he cried.
I laughed, bring my fingers away from his trousers and over to his face to trace lovingly along his lips. "You'll have to suck them yourself, Dominic," I said roughly. I knew he loved when I took demanding tones with him, another gift I felt I should give him. My world exploded in heat as his mouth closed around my index and middle finger, hungrily lapping at them with his tongue as he coated them with as much saliva as he could. He was so terribly good with his mouth, positively godlike when it came to the action of sucking. He knew exactly how to devour my skin and my being from whatever part of me his lips attached to.
Satisfied with the wetness along my digits, I extracted them from his mouth with a pop, and he forget his position momentarily as he looked at me, obviously proud of his work before I brought my hand back to the flesh of his back. The promise of my intentions forced his expression back to one of wild abandon and need, becoming very much a puddy in my hands to be molded as I saw fit.
My fingers circles his entrance slowly, loving the way he shook as though the earth beneath him was quaking as I did so. He pressed our chests together, mouth latching to my neck in expectation of the cry he knew he would give. Pushing my fingers in slowly, I smiled at the heat of him, and laughed at the muffled groan that vibrated from his mouth through my skin and into my pulse, becoming part of me in the process.
My fist and fingers loved him the way I wished I could, teased him in the ways the rest of me would simply have to be patient for. After a few pumps and twists of my fingers, I felt his body go rigid, and smiled as I awaited the flow of his come into my hand.
It never came.
Worried I pulled away from him, staring with sheer concern into his eyes.
They were not on me.
His eyes were on the door.
I did not want to look, but I knew that I had to. Dominic's chest was heaving beneath me. Not in lust, but in fear.
Slowly, I brought my eyes to the door, terrified of what I would find.
Silhouetted by garish hall light behind her, Ellen stood, arms her her sides, catalogue cards at her feet as she starred wide eyed at the scene before her. Lips parted, it looked as though she were about to speak, gasp, or yell. But she had made no sound. In one motion she turned from us and shut the door, bolting down the hall.
I was frozen, feeling Dominic react beneath me as he put his clothes back into place
"Matthew!" he cried urgently. "Matthew, fucking go after her!"
I brought my eyes back to him, watching as his gray orbs glistened with frightful tears. I could not respond as freely as he could. I did not know why, no tears or sounds coming from me in that moment. I envied him.
"Matthew! For fuck's sake! Go!"
His command was the catalyst I needed, grabbing his face and kissing his lips fiercely before I left. I sucked what courage I could from his mouth, hoping that our love would give me the strength to make it through the next 10 minutes, 10 days and, possibly, 10 years.
I ran after Ellen, ripping open the door and quickly turning the corner as I left Dominic to fix himself before he returned to the public eye. Every fiber of my essence prayed she had not gone to the headmaster, had not told a teacher, had not left completely.
I found her, back to me, behind her desk as she shook and anxiously wrung her hands together. She shook them, hoping the nerves would leave her, but they did not, and she took to wringing them once more.
Standing in front of her desk, I look a long, deep breath before I found the strength to speak. "Ellen," I whispered loudly, urgently. She turned quickly, seeing me before her, and then brought her eyes to the wall next to her. She was panting, hands still in front of her as she listened to me speak. "Ellen, please you have to let us explain."
"I never - I didn't - I just needed to - I wanted - my job -" she could hardly form sentences as her eyes avoided me completely. It stung more than I thought it would, but, then again, my trust needed to be entirely in her and I knew it was faulty, her inability to look at me saying everything I didn't need to know.
"Please," I whispered in a cry. "Please, let us. I am begging you."
She turned to me then, eyes wide with fear. In that moment, I had never seen her look more beautiful.
Slowly, she began to nod, silently affirming that she would allow us to attempt to explain and reason with her. It was in that nod that I realized that the future of my career and my relationship was entirely in her hands from that moment on.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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Date: 2011-01-21 11:57 pm (UTC)mmmkay...now i can settle in....maybe...fecking work....
<333
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Date: 2011-01-22 12:04 am (UTC)Then: hotness!!
Then: Oh noes!! Ellen!! I can't help but feel extremely for her... Especially after last chapter.
And does that ending mean they're going to open up to her?? AHHH I need moar!! =P
*hugs*
Thank you for going back to this =)
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Date: 2011-01-24 07:50 am (UTC)I working on more bb! I am so glad you haven't forgotten this *hugs*
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Date: 2011-01-22 12:43 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-24 07:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-22 01:00 am (UTC)THIS IS SO NERVEWRACKINGGGGG.
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Date: 2011-01-24 07:51 am (UTC)*hugs tight*
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Date: 2011-01-22 01:13 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-24 07:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-22 09:30 pm (UTC)And...oh no! I think I would have died if I was in Dom or Matt's position when Ellen saw them. I hope things will be alright for their futures
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Date: 2011-01-24 07:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-22 10:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-24 07:53 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-23 02:20 am (UTC)*Your sex scenes are just hot as well, the words you find are so intense I can smell and touch everything, and damn, it makes me feel things, like...it turns me on, what can I say.
*The love and the PASSION between M and D is...I don´t know, I can´t find the words. Each one is the other´s air and food and water, it´s SO beautiful.
*And OH MY GOOOOOOOD, ELLEN SAW THEM O.O Jesus *in shock*
<3
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Date: 2011-01-24 07:54 am (UTC)Each one is the other´s air and food and water, it´s SO beautiful.
YES. I try so hard to convey this and I always feel I do it wrong. I'm glad that you get this sense. They are everything to one another. Everything
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Date: 2011-01-23 06:05 am (UTC)I was starting to love these little trysts Matthew and Dominic were having at the library but this one just got so emotional. Out of no where Dom started that conversation and suddenly the filthy, carnal nature because something deep and meaningful. I loved the way you wrote the sudden change in the atmosphere. It flowed so perfectly.
"I will," I continued, "have you tonight. Hot, and begging beneath me as I make love to you. That is how I'm going to have you. Nothing we do will ever be as dirty as 'fucking.'"
*wipes tears* Wow, that was just stunning! I have no other words actually, you left me quite speechless.
But the end, I was not expecting. A part of me knew this might happen but when it actually did I was shocked! But I'm guessing Ellen would be cool, yeah? The doubt was already planted in her mind.
I'll stop rambling now. Thank you for bringing this fic back! <333
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Date: 2011-01-24 07:56 am (UTC)Thank you so much for this amazing comment. I have missed seeing you around, though I know you've taken time for school and things. I do hope college is well for you <3
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Date: 2011-01-24 12:15 pm (UTC)this whole need for Dominic to prove to someone that how he feels for Matthew is as right as it could be
That and his need to show him off, methinks. I mean, Dominic and Matthew would be dying to be open about it but the situation doesn't allow them.
I've missed this fic and I haven't been able to TLS because it was way ahead when I first saw it. (I was on a holiday and when I came back, already 5 or 6 chapters were updated, lol!) I'm still trying to find the time to catch with it...
College is well, exams are still on until the end of this week. How are things with you? <3
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Date: 2011-01-23 10:48 am (UTC)literally shocked. I mean, I knew it would happen someday but WOAH.
*hugs* ♥
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Date: 2011-01-24 07:56 am (UTC)Working on fixing this ASAP!
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Date: 2011-01-23 01:11 pm (UTC)It was so hot and lovely and guhhh and then Ellen found them and I was just like :OOOOO I so hope she makes the right choice. :(
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Date: 2011-01-24 07:57 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-24 07:43 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-24 07:57 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-01-25 01:03 pm (UTC)Ok, we all knew this would happen eventually but...!!
His wishes, we both knew, were merely pipe dreams for an era we knew we would never live to see. She would not accept us, and if she did, society would no longer accept her.
And there was my first hate-the-world moment of the day.
No other movement needed to happen, for I was content in those minutes just to have him against me, as though the mere pressure against my body placated any form of anxiety or knowledge of the outside world.
I love these two. So much. I just... They mean so much to each other and the fact that they can't show it kills me so bad :( it's like they only have each other in the whole world and need each other to... survive even? Idk, but I get this feeling that they absolutely belong to each other. And it's so romantic I want to cry!
"I love you Matthew," he whispered, before kissing me with the same urgency I had used on him. "I love you. I love you." He repeated the words, punctuating them with kisses until our mouths sealed together as though they had been welded.
LIKE I SAID - it kills me :'( jesus christ, that is just beautiful. It's like he needs to prove to himself (and Matt) that what they have isn't wrong :(
It was in that nod that I realized that the future of my career and my relationship was entirely in her hands from that moment on.
*mumbles to herself* please please please please, Ellen, be human, please. We already know she's a strong and amazing woman, but I still can't help but wonder what she will say. And to see it from her pov.
Meeeep! I have missed this fic so much and it's more amazing than ever!! <3333
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Date: 2011-02-25 05:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-04-11 03:17 am (UTC):O
:O
:O
This is just......so beautiful. Omg I can't even stand it. I just...want to hug you for writing that, holy shit.
Oh Ellen. Please give the boys a chance. ;_;